Died

Heyy
2 post 1 day , how good is that ? But no before you get carried away thinking that this is going to be happy post , I can tell you it's not.
These are all my feelings and if you have negative comments about it please keep it to yourself and leave this page thankyou.
Alright so there's a love war goin on now . This girl seems to be interested in him and looking at their conversation (well obviously I stalk) I can't help feeling a total shit. Really seeing this situation and I have to keep it to myself kills and I don't even know what to feel. Can I delete away my feelings please? I'm sorry I really tried getting my feelings away but I can't do it. I keep stalking and stalking and each time I see new things my heart sinks and I can't keep up with this .Fuck hell please help me because I'm really done. I know what I'm about to see will cause my heart to sink into disappointments and fear but I cant hold back my curiosity and continue stalking. Is this counted as suicide because I know its gonna hurt like shit yett I continue to do it and each time I die in that pain . I'm tired I'm done. I don't want to feel anything and tonight I really wish im gone . Who should I please?My parents or him ? What about me, can I please myself? Kept giving and all I get is shit. I understand life is about giving and expecting nothing in return but there's a limit to all my givings because one day (which is right now) I'll end up nothing to give. Gave all I could and I'm left with nothing. I'm nothing.