A Living dead

Its a friday , a really planless and lonely friday . Its been so long since I have been this lonely on a friday , other days at least I still have my friends with me but today , I'm all alone .
Went back my house which is all quite and souless . I don't even know what I want to do really, just gonna hit my bed and cry I guess ?
I want to sleep but the slumber doesn't fall on me , neither do I want to be awake facing  this painful world . Everyone are looking forward to fridays and weekends while I'm here living like a dead.
The thought of me having a long journey ahead and I have to go through it alone , is scary .
I'm afraid of being alone , and I don't even know when had that fear developed. Don't know what I want to do next and what do I want in life.
Im back to the old xingzi , who have nothing to look forward to in life , just living like a dead .
TGIF ? No, TGIA - Thank God Im Alive